Exemption

Cast all that aside she said. "Don't you see?" It was so obvious that Cassy couldn't comprehend why he didn't understand. The crimson color of his clothing, the scarlet dying his cheeks, and of course the change in character so unlike him. "Can't you see? The change is real I can see it in your face and hands, your clothing, your very being has been brightened."
"All I see are the blemishes of my past." Jake replied, "there is nothing special here, I don't see what you think is so glorious. You say that Jesus washed me completely clean of sin! You promise me that I am clean within! What do I see? Nothing, there is no cleanliness in me, I see the truth, my sin has stained my clothing and my body. The rags I wear haven't been made new. You speak only lies, you are a false prophet of a false God!"
Cassy looked away wiping tears away from her eyes. "I am sorry", she said softly, "I have failed you." Slowly she walked away from him broken and striving to see why that heartache had been given her. As she wandered the paths of the broken down palace her silent argument ran forth from her mind. "Why God? How could you send me some where that I don't belong among people who don't want to know the truth. You have placed me in a field of unfertile soil with the instruction of reaping a harvest. Why God?!?" Desolate she wandered the streets of that crude place. Filled with filth of the worst sorts. It truly was the Sodom and Gemorah of modern day. Lust and Greed were evident everywhere. It was commonplace to see the worst offenses against humanity and God. This was the unloveable of all society, these were the most hard hearted hateful people in all of God's creation. "Why God? Have I displeased you? Is this punishment for some sin I have committed against you?" There was no answer for Cassy. All she heard or saw or felt was the helpless ness of her plight. She could only see the physical plain on which she lived. With nothing left she slowly walked home along the worst street of them all. The street where the fakers lived, or as they liked to call themselves upper society. They choose to ignore all that was around them trying with all their might to maintain the illusion that the broken down palace was a good place. Ignoring the hurt and pain that was part of everyday life. The street of the fakers was whitewashed every morning to wipe away the stains of society. They meticulously scrubbed and disinfected every possession they owned to keep the filth out. This was Cassy's street. The fakers were her neighbors. She walked down the street and by this time was accustomed to the condemnation she received from fellow believers. Her own people did not understand why she went to the slums everyday. They could not comprehend, so they assumed that she was backslidden. They all kept the opinion that she was involved in the most unsavory of deeds in the slums.
Cassy no longer cared or even listened to their jibes and remarks. She had grown accustomed to them. The pain she felt was far worse than anything the fakers could have said to her. She was alone in this place with a burden that was impossible to fulfill. "I am lost and there is no one who will save me. Where did the joy go? I remember when I first was assigned this task, I could not wait. Life was different then. I actually felt God, he was here and he cared for me. Now all I have is the burden with no way to fulfill it. I am destitute!" Even as that particular thought crossed the threshold of her mind Jake appeared in her minds eye. It was he who had, a short while ago argued that there indeed was no change in himself. His arguments against the power of God attacked and destroyed her own pity party.
"Dear God I am a weak and unbelieving sinner. If I am to continue with this burden I ask and pray that you will renew in me each day the awe of your holines, the greatness of your sacrafice, and the immensity of your character. I alone am nothing this place where I have been called is not my own, neither are the words I speak. Forgive me the lack of understanding your soveriengty."
There was nothing immense or awe inspiring in her prayer. Nothing that could be written down and used in liturgies for years to come. No this prayer was simple and direct. It was an appeal from subject to king. It was overwhelming and releasing. Cassy could breathe once again free of doubt or dispair. God had once again one the battle.